I have been thinking a lot about what love is and what it isn’t. What does it mean when someone tells you that they love you? If they really love you, do they need to tell you? Shouldn’t they be showing you how they love you through little things they do every day? I know personally, I appreciate more showing and less telling. I am not talking about ‘physically’ showing here, although I am not averse to that. The confusion about love is not unique, as Webster’s dictionary contains 9 different definitions for love. No wonder we are confused about what love is!
When someone offers you their love, it is a precious little gift you can wrap up and hold in your heart. How many times have you found yourself giving love to other people, yet never receiving anything in return? Sure, it would be nice if all love was reciprocal, but it doesn’t always work that way. You finally get up the courage to tell someone you love them, and then they say they aren’t ‘in love’ with you. What does that mean? Love comes from a feeling you have inside toward someone else. It is an appreciation or a feeling compelling you to give a little bit of yourself to another person or what I call ‘little gift of love’. Sharing and giving – that is what love is about. You don’t have to be ‘in it’, it just is. You shouldn’t tell someone you love them because you are needy, instead, you should say it because you are giving love, not taking it. The idea that you expect them to love you back is a bit selfish, don’t you think? If you are full of love for yourself, it doesn’t matter if someone reciprocates your love or not.
Love seems a lot easier to give than receive. If someone shows me love, I sometimes find it hard to accept and wind up in tears. Not tears of sadness, but joy and amazement that someone would share their little gift of love with me. You may be surprised where love comes from and how you get that precious little gift. It isn’t always in the shape of the “I love you” phrase. It can be words of encouragement in troubled times from a mere acquaintance, a hug from a friend on Christmas when they are sad and lonely, or a parent holding a sick child on their lap. So many types of love to amaze me! We have so much love to give each other yet we often hide it, for fear that others will see our vulnerability. Without love, where would humanity be? Being vulnerable is human isn’t it? Do you want to be an animal or a human? We should be able to give love away easily – it should seem like no effort and we should desire nothing in return for our gift.
It frustrates me that filmmakers so often portray love as rampant sex on the dining room table. Sure, people can have instant connections that result in crazy behavior, but how often does that actually turn into a long-lasting relationship or true love? Is it possible that those connections are merely a transfer of those ‘little gifts of love’. When there is a strong connection between two people, do people give away their love without really thinking about it? or without questioning why? Love seems to be a strange ebb and flow of energy between people. Maybe those electrical connections between people just a ‘little gift of love’ transferring from one person to another. If you are lucky enough to have someone share their ‘little gift of love with you’, hang on to it and protect it. However, don’t be stingy. Feel free to pass it on, because love is a gift worth sharing.
This was my favorite quirky contemplations of all those you have written. Love to me is giving and doing for others without expecting something in return. While I am at it, I love you very much. Auntie
AND…. I love you! :>)
So which type of love are you talking about? There are different types, love for family, love for friends, love for a pet, I love chocolate or my favorite song. Romantic love has different characteristics than love for a friend. Love for a child is stronger than anything.
We don’t have a good way to describe love as an emotion (chemical reaction) vs. love as a decision. I think most people apply the word love to anything that makes them happy, only when it’s making them happy. But it would probably be helpful if we all thought about and created our own definitions of love.
You should also read about the 5 languages of love.
i have the 5 languages of love book if you would like to borrow it. i’ll just need to find it!
If you find the 5 languages of love book, I will take it off your hands 🙂
I loved it Stacey and I do love you Sweetheart.