I just returned from my monthly book club meeting and realized that due to the success of the Stephanie Meyer Twilight series, every author is writing about vampires. (Even people who never wrote about vampires before.) What happened to creative people who were actually ‘creative’? With all this writing about vampires, I was wondering if they were moving into the neighborhood. Since I live in Arizona with over 300 days of sun a year, I probably don’t have much to worry about. Then again, you can’t be too careful. Do I need to start a neighborhood vampire watch?
I like vampires as much as the next person (as long as they are not sucking on my neck). I have seen all three Twilight movies and like the ‘nice vampires’. My question is, how do you know the nice ones from the ones who kill you? The house across the street just sold to some new people. Will vampires be moving in? If so, how will I know? Do I have to wear this garlic necklace because it is pretty or as protection from all the vampires? Tomorrow, I definitely won’t be strolling down the street to the mailbox after dark. Certainly the bills can wait another day.
At least all the feral cats in the neighborhood should keep the vampires busy for a while (or should I say fed?). Surely they can “appetize” on them, until they get really hungry. I was wondering if vampires like vegetarians. They don’t want that iron poor blood do they? Would it help if I put a sign on my front door with a cow and a big red X over it? I know we are supposed to get out and meet our neighbors to create a sense of community, but how does that work with vampires? It just seems too risky.
I don’t understand all the hype about vampires, but it does remind me of show trends. Like when ER first came out and then all the other stations followed with their own medical shows. Then there were cop shows, talk shows, and reality shows. I think I am about ready for this vampire trend to be over so I can feel comfortable being outside after dark, and I can take off this stinky garlic necklace. Even my 4-year-old daughter doesn’t like a necklace this gaudy. What is next after vampires? How about teddy bears? Or is it time for smurfs to emerge from retirement?